Assorted thoughts

Growing up in a religious environment imbues you with certain perceptions of the external world. One in particular that I remember goes something like this: "Now there’s Christians like us. Real Christians. Then there’s people that just say they’re Christians. They talk the talk but they don’t really live it." I always prided myself on spotting these people. There’s one over there now. Look at him just sitting there, not giving a shit about his parents. I should go hold the door open for that old lady--I bet God would really notice that.

Masculinity is an interesting subject. Now that mainstream views on homosexuality have shifted I think it’s forcing a lot of straight men to re evaluate how acceptable behavior is defined. For example, if you go out to a bar and meet a great girl the first thing you do is tell your friends “Oh my god I met this great girl: She’s cute and funny and we really hit it off.” But as of this writing you can’t say the same stuff when you meet a guy. “Oh my god last night I met the most amazing man. We were talking about sports and religion and I was like ‘Oh my god I totally hope we become friends.’"

I get irritated when my cell phone breaks. It doesn’t have a cord and lets me make calls anywhere in the world. Meanwhile, my grandparents chipped ice off Lake Erie to heat so they could take a bath. As Louis C.K. points out we have nothing to complain about.

There are probably better ways to spend your time on the Internet than using the Wendy’s store locator. But I need to know what my Wendy’s options are no matter what zip code I’m in. Go ahead and bookmark it: http://www.wendys.com/

I never wanted to go to England before because I heard the bars close at 11. Then someone told me that’s just the pubs—nightclubs stay open later. So now I want to go.

If I was a teacher I’d chew gum every day even though my students wouldn’t be allowed to. “My job is to prepare you for the real world. Other people have shit you don’t. Get used to it.”

And finally a quote from our friend Woody Harrelson:

"I wrapped a movie called 'Zombieland,' in which I was constantly under assault by zombies, then flew to New York, still very much in character," Harrelson said in a statement issued Friday by his publicist.
"With my daughter at the airport I was startled by a paparazzo, who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie," he said.

Quite understandably indeed.