It's high time The Trash Beer Incident was explained to the masses. This will accomplish two aims--settling The Trash Beer Incident once and for all and mentioning Kristin Helms' name in the blog. It's doubtful she'd read any further without seeing her name in ink.
One fateful summer Atlanta day I returned home to find a case and a half of beer in front of my townhouse. Right near where they pick up the trash. The untampered with beer wasn't in the trash. It was just on the drainage grate near the trash.
Now to me, what you got right there is free beer. That ain't something that comes along every day and you should act accordingly.
Now to my companions, elitist members of the finer sex Kristin and Kat Davis, what you got there is Trash Beer. To them, it was as if the beer was itself garbage, rather than an unspoiled path to intoxication.
We went back and forth for quite some time on the matter. But you know what? In the end, they ended up carting themselves to Green's Liqour and forking over their radio station and cable company wages the next time they needed booze. Me? A simple matter of cooling off the curbside cocktails.
I mean honestly, is some robber dude going to buy a syringe that penetrates glass and poison a 12 pack of beer? Who has time for that? Wouldn't the robber just drink the beer? Of course he would. We beat the robber to the punch.
Who was right? Well, I was. Girls are funny.
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I think you made the right choice Danny.
ReplyDeleteI drank that beer and it was only mildly terrible.
I like how you made up a scenario to justify the trash beer. Something like a family had to leave town quickly and was forced to throw out their perfectly good beer. That doesn't happen Danny. Trash beer!
ReplyDeleteOh yeah the scenario! See, these people visited a Muslim neighbor for the weekend. They realized they couldn't leave the booze with the Muslim so they left it on the curb for an open minded neighbor to find.
ReplyDeleteour homeland security has been breached by those terrorists! i don't wanna be friends w/no islamics who can't drink beer.
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